The Lazy Child
Today I couldn't get my daughter motivated to get out the door to school. It was most annoying. All she wanted to do was potter around in her room. I gave her a couple of reminders but she just kept on mucking around.
At 5 minutes before 8 o'clock I started to get firm with her and said "Beck, we are leaving for school in 20 minutes, whether you are ready or not. You need to get dressed, have breakfast and pack your bag". Then I left her again.
Finally at about 8.15am she emerged, and all of a sudden was rushing around furiously trying to be ready on time. But I stuck to my guns. I said to her, "It's a pity you won't have time to have breakfast now", and went to the car. Becky followed, shoes and socks in her hand as they hadn't been put on yet.
I drove her to school and there was not much conversation. I stopped at the gate, she got out and that was about all. Becky seemed to be testing me this morning to see if I would stick to my boundaries. I think she found out the answer to that one. Poor Becky had to go hungry until morning break as she hadn't eaten any breakfast.
What Becky had been doing was trying to exert some control over me by making me wait for her. I have no idea why this happened. But now Becky knows that if she tries that again the result will be the same - missing out on breakfast. This is a valuable lesson for any child to learn.
I know it is sad to have to do that but if I keep on saving Becky she will never learn that the world requires people to be on time. I had to leave for work. I had to earn money to feed my children and pay the mortgage. And that's the way life is. Becky had a responsibility to be at school on time.
Now here's what we must remember: we need to stop rescuing our kids and let them learn things the hard way sometimes. I understand this is not always a pleasant thing but it is a necessary thing. The more we rescue our kids the more they will expect it. Remember our job as a parent is to make sure that our kids are equipped for adult life.
The end result was that Beck was very hungry until morning tea break today. But I think perhaps she will think twice about doing the same thing again. Why? Because she didn't like the end result. She experienced the consequences of her poor choices this morning.
It was heart breaking to see a hungry child going to school. But I had no control over Beck's actions. She made some bad choices today. But when we allow our kids to make mistakes and learn from them they will thank you later on in life. I guarantee it.
